On this date: Taken from “Tomorrow’s Headlines Today…”

Editor’s note: This is an excerpt from a Naples Press Club Newsletter from December 1995, written by David Pfaff. For us to move forward we must remember where we have been. On This Date is a fun way for NPC members to find out about the Naples Press Club’s past.

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These have been difficult days for me. First, the Republicans succeeded in shutting down the government… then they let it open again. And then Princess Di told the world she’s no longer waiting for me… she’s already had an affair with some bloke.

Here’s a multiple choice item:

If you had attended a recent gathering of community old-timers (those who have lived here since Hurricane Donna) and all 500 of you present have been transported back to 1960, a crowd that size would have been:

1.      About as big as the city of Everglades

2.      Bigger than Marco (what’s Marco?)

3.      More importantly, bigger than Collier City (what’s Collier City?)

4.      Bigger than any place here in which to hold it

And the answer is all of the above. If that doesn’t convince you to protect yourself by faxing or calling your contribution (have no reader; unlike most who use this word, he wants only words, not $$-Ed) to 261-8984, then stay tuned.

Terry Miller is reliably reported to have opened his own 900 phone line. For 99 cents a minute, you do not get to talk to a psychic but rather you learn how to start breakfast and lunch clubs, meet lots of fascinating people (and a few weird ones), and eat free. Ever the entrepreneur and always alert to spin-offs of good things, his next 900 number will be for a group to be known as Meetings Anonymous.

But he missed his best bet. Back in September and October, he was considering opening the International college of Ark Building. He felt qualified to teach the required course in counting by twos himself but was having trouble locating a carpenter who could work in cubits. But looking outside, you may have a second chance, Terry.

By the way… if the Naples Metro is the 98th largest Hispanic market in the U.S., why aren’t any of you writing or talking in Spanish?

Michelle Vachon has French covered, although it’s reported that she would be asked to speak English if she tried her French-Canadian in Paris. Of course, the Parisians don’t admit that the French speak French.

Did you know that the only reason newspapers continue to exist in this electronic and cyber age as the font of all truth and knowledge is that you can’t print the comic strips on the radio? And they are the font of all truth and knowledge in this modern world.

As you can tell, this was not a good month for Naples media… seriously. First, we lost the gentle Tom Hayer, longtime reporter/editor for the Naples Daily News and its predecessor, the Collier County News. And then Carl Loveday, a genuinely nice man, lost his Marci. Harsh reminders of how close we are all are to that last -30-.

If you have an excerpt from an old newsletter that you would like to see included in On This Date contact Penny Fisher at pfisher@naplesnews.com or 239-435-3417.

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